The M word.

So Kate and William did it. My best friend did it last year.

Marriage. Matrimony. The declaration to another that you will love them forever. Pretty much.

I watched the Royal wedding. It was without a doubt spectacular; as it should be. However, what about people who invite the Prince of Monaco, but he's too busy to attend? Are weddings all about who you invite? Are they about just the two of you, enjoying your moment in the sun? Are couples buying into an image when they get married? Are they hoping that there will be a couture dress and an 18-tiered cake in it for them? I think the sanctity of marriage has been lost in some cases. Divorce is common, as are affairs. There's also these dramatically long engagements, spanning years, decades, whatever. My own humble opinion is that engagement is the precursor to marriage, not the place you wait forever to never be asked again if you want to be wed.

I have stated frequently that I don't think I will ever get married. I can not see myself walking down the aisle, or signing the big book with the fancy pen. However, after watching THE wedding, I sort of changed my mind. I mean, I'm not a royalist in any shape or form. When I watched them, however, I could sort of see myself, mirrored in the nerves, in the coyness, in the laughter and the little comments. The actual intimacy, although it appeared to be lost, was actually there in parts and I liked it.

I may never marry a prince, there aren't that many going spare these days, but what if there is someone who would meet me at the end of the alter? Someone who was like me; who could see the point in it all. Who wanted to declare something personal, to me, no one else, apart from those who would be eavesdropping from the pews. Perhaps romance isn't really dead. Perhaps there is someone else who thought romance was dead. Then they decide to think again. Is there someone from everyone? I have seen people fall in love, as we all have and I have seen it break down. I have been a part of that breakdown. I've fallen in love and out of it and been pushed out of it too. When is the time when you decide that it's okay to get hurt. It's okay to put yourself out there. Make a fool of yourself. I do not do that willingly.

Perhaps it actually lingers where you least expect it. Romance. Love. Whatever. Maybe I'll find it. Maybe. Maybe I did and it's gone now. Who knows really.